The moment two people stand at the altar, surrounded by friends and family, hands clasped and hearts pounding, it’s supposed to be the beginning of something sacred and beautiful—a lifelong promise, a leap of faith, a covenant before God. It’s not meant to be the opening negotiations of a contract with an escape clause. But as prenuptial agreements, or “prenups,” become ever more popular in America, especially among young couples, the question emerges: Is this practice biblical? Does a prenup help or harm a Christian marriage? Let’s dig in.
Marriage: Covenant, Not Contract
From the very first marriage in Genesis, God’s design is clear. “A man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). Jesus affirmed this in Mark 10:6-9, saying that marriage is meant to be a permanent, unbreakable union—“What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Marriage is described throughout the Bible as a covenant, not a contract. A contract is based on mutual benefit and protection of interests. A covenant is fundamentally about sacrificial, life-giving, and lasting commitment.
A contract plans for the possibility of a relationship falling apart. A covenant chooses faith, love, and unity, believing in God’s faithfulness beyond human weakness. There is no Plan B in God’s blueprint for marriage.
The Rise of the Prenup
So why are prenups so common now? Our culture is anxious. Divorce rates have left many cautious or even fearful, so people look for a safety net. Lawyers and financial advisors will say a prenup is “just wise planning”—a way to protect assets, honor children from previous relationships, or clarify responsibilities if things go wrong. And for wealthy families or business owners, these agreements are sometimes seen as strategic.
But for Christian couples, this kind of planning comes with a high cost. Most prenuptial agreements don’t arise because of real, specific vulnerabilities—they arise from fear and uncertainty about the future of the marriage itself. They start the journey together with an “exit strategy” already mapped out.
Preparing to Separate?
Let’s be honest: signing a prenup is, at its core, preparing for divorce. It’s imagining, “What will be mine and what will be yours if our marriage doesn’t last?” But that very question runs counter to every foundational truth about biblical marriage. The idea of “one flesh” is about complete unity—emotional, spiritual, sexual, and practical. It’s about saying, “Everything I am, and everything I have, I give to you—no holding back.”
When a couple carves out exceptions or boundaries right from the start, trust takes a hit. Instead of uniting fully, they each keep a part of themselves in reserve. Prenups subtly tell a spouse, “There are limits to my trust. There are conditions to this love.” That’s not the picture of Christlike love we’re called to. Ephesians 5:22-33 sets the gold standard: husbands and wives are to love each other with self-sacrifice, putting the other’s good above their own, just as Christ loved the church.
Undermining Trust and Self-Giving
A prenup shortchanges the marriage covenant. It places legal and financial boundaries where God intends there be radical generosity, mutual self-giving, and unity. Can true “one flesh” living happen with a legal document dividing the spoils in case of separation? Imagine parents listening to their daughter or son recite wedding vows and then quietly slipping a legal agreement into the stack of invitations, “just in case this falls apart.” Does it inspire hope? Does it encourage faith?
Trust flourishes when both husband and wife know they are completely accepted, secure, and safe in the promise of forever. When a prenup is on the table, doubt enters the conversation: “Does my spouse really believe we’ll stay together? Do they care about my needs as much as their own? Are we entering this partnership with one eye on the exits?” It’s a mindset that corrodes intimacy and makes it harder to cultivate a strong, thriving marriage.
Not in the Bible
It’s important to note: There is no mention of prenuptial agreements in Scripture—Old Testament or New. God’s people are repeatedly called to faithfulness, sometimes at great personal cost. The Bible prescribes unity, forgiveness, and sacrificial love as the bedrock for handling mistakes, misunderstandings, or even betrayals, not contracts to preemptively carve out protection for ourselves.
Throughout biblical history, marriage is painted as an act of trust—leaving behind life as it was and forging a new, united life together. Couples are encouraged to work through challenges with forgiveness and enduring hope, not legal contingency plans.
What About Wisdom?
Of course, in today’s world there are rare scenarios where Christian ethicists have acknowledged a prenup may serve a purpose—particularly when there are vulnerable children from previous marriages who need protection, or in matters of inherited family property. In those select situations, the agreement should be driven by wise stewardship and compassion, not self-interest, suspicion, or fear of future marital failure.
But even then, any such arrangement must be weighed carefully. It must not contradict the heart and spirit of biblical unity, love, and selflessness. If the “why” behind the prenup is to preserve selfish control, to punish or limit a spouse, or simply to prepare for the worst, it’s a red flag. Christians are called to prepare not for failure, but for faithfulness.
God’s Vision for Marriage
At its core, marriage is where the Gospel is meant to get skin on. It’s two people promising, “I am yours, come what may.” It’s a daily reflection of the faithfulness, patience, and unbreakable love that God has for us. Jesus didn’t love us with conditions or a contingency plan. He gave Himself completely. Marriage is our highest earthly example of that kind of love.
God knows our human weaknesses—He made provision for forgiveness and grace because none of us are perfect. But the answer to human failings isn’t to start the journey with mistrust and division; it’s to lean into God’s power to keep the promises we make. It’s to open every part of our lives, including our checkbooks and our fears, to the healing, securing love of Christ.
Living Without a Net
A couple married “without a net” does so courageously, knowing marriage won’t always be easy, but believing in the God who is bigger than any difficulty they might face. It’s scary, sure—but it’s also where real oneness is born. It’s where the adventure gets real, where both husband and wife are fully invested, not just legally, but spiritually, emotionally, and relationally.
Marriage isn’t safe because of lawyers, paperwork, or financial boundaries. It’s safe because two people daily invite God to be at the center, letting His love root out fear and selfishness and replace them with grace, trust, and joy. That’s not naïve—it’s faith in action. It’s how marriages go the distance, blessing generations to come.
When Trouble Comes
What if things go wrong? What about sin, betrayal, loss, or even the threat of divorce? Scripture says God hates divorce, but He also offers deep healing, forgiveness, and restoration to couples who seek Him. The best protection for a marriage isn’t a prenup—it’s humility, accountability, wise counsel from the body of Christ, and a commitment to reconciliation wherever possible.
Sometimes, despite every effort, marriages might still fail. When that happens, God’s love remains, and Christian communities need to extend support and compassion—not condemnation. But that truth doesn’t change God’s blueprint for marriage or justify weakening it with legal safety nets from the outset.
Final Thoughts
In a culture obsessed with self-protection and contingency plans, Christian marriage offers something radically different: permanent, self-giving love fueled by faith in a faithful God. Prenuptial agreements aren’t part of that vision. They symbolize fear, doubt, and the possibility of giving up—rather than selfless, trust-filled, forever love.
If you’re a believer preparing for marriage, ask God to help you lay aside the urge to “protect your interests” and to lean into the adventure of giving your whole heart, and your whole life, to your spouse. Marriage is God’s idea, and His way remains the best way: join hands, join hearts, leave the contingency plans at the door, and step forward together in faith. That’s the covenant that brings the deepest joy, peace, and blessing you’ll ever know.