Answer each question with “yes” (mostly true for me) or “no” (mostly not true for me). Circle each “yes” answer and count the total.
1. Do you tolerate mistreatment from people in hopes of being loved?
2. Do you depend on people who are emotionally unavailable to care for you?
3. Do you feel compelled to help people to feel better or to solve their problems?
4. Do you rescue others from the consequences of their irresponsible behavior?
5. Do you feel empty, bored, or unimportant if you’re not helping someone or responding to a crisis?
6. Is it hard for you to say “no” when someone asks you for help?
7. Is it hard for you to ask for help?
8. In close relationships do you lose interest in your own life?
9. Are you quick to get angry about injustices that were done to others?
10. Do you often talk about other people and their problems?
11. Do you worry about how other people are feeling?
12. Do you worry about other people’s opinions of you?
13. Do you keep quiet to avoid conflicts with people?
14. Is it hard for you to talk with a boss or someone else in authority?
15. Do you feel more comfortable giving to others rather than receiving from them?
16. Is it difficult for you to receive attention, compliments, or gifts from others?
The questions you answered “yes” to indicate that you struggle with that characteristic of codependency. If you have five or more yes answers of if you answered yes to any question that is very painful or problematic for you then you
may have a problem with codependency, in which case you should seek in-person help from a Christian counselor.
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