Marriage is a sacred covenant instituted by God to reflect the relationship between Christ and the church. A Christ-centered marriage puts God at the center and allows Him to guide the relationship. When a couple makes Christ the foundation of their marriage, it provides the solid ground needed to withstand life’s storms and grow together in love.
Prioritizing God
The most important aspect of having a Christ-centered marriage is prioritizing God above all else, including your spouse. Jesus said the greatest commandment is to “love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind” (Matthew 22:37). This means your love for God should exceed your love for anyone or anything else, including your husband or wife. When God is first in your life, it frees you to love your spouse in a healthy, God-honoring way. You are not relying on your spouse to meet all your needs or make you complete. Your identity and security are found in Christ alone. From this secure foundation, you can give and receive love without fear or expectation. Putting God first also means aligning your marriage with His design and purposes. You commit to living according to biblical principles and making decisions that please God, even when it’s difficult. You invite God into every aspect of your relationship – your communication, conflict resolution, intimacy, parenting, and more. Your marriage becomes a partnership in serving God together.
Modeling Christ’s Love
In Ephesians 5, the apostle Paul instructs husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (v. 25). This self-sacrificial love is the model for a Christ-centered marriage. Husbands are called to lead their wives by serving them, putting their needs before their own. Wives are called to respect and submit to their husbands’ leadership (Ephesians 5:22-24). This doesn’t mean blind obedience, but a posture of trust and support as the husband seeks to honor God in his leadership. Mutual submission to one another out of reverence for Christ (v. 21) creates an atmosphere of love, honor and mutual care. When a couple models Christ’s love for one another, it not only strengthens their marriage, but also serves as a powerful witness to the world. Their relationship reflects the gospel – the sacrificial love of Christ for His bride, the church. It’s a living parable of God’s redeeming love.
Relying on God’s Grace
No couple is perfect. Even in the best marriages, there will be times of conflict, disappointment and sin. A Christ-centered marriage recognizes the need for God’s grace and forgiveness. When you make mistakes or hurt your spouse, you quickly confess and ask for forgiveness. You extend the same grace to your spouse that God has extended to you. Relying on God’s grace also means having patience and compassion when your spouse falls short. You recognize that you are both works in progress, being sanctified by God. You commit to building each other up, not tearing each other down. You choose to believe the best, give the benefit of the doubt, and keep short accounts. Ultimately, a Christ-centered marriage is not about perfection, but about two imperfect people striving to love God and each other with His help. It’s about grace, forgiveness, and mutual growth in holiness. As you rely on God’s grace, it frees you to be authentic, vulnerable and real with each other.
Pursuing Spiritual Intimacy
In a Christ-centered marriage, spiritual intimacy is just as important as emotional and physical intimacy. You prioritize growing together spiritually through practices like:
When you make spiritual growth a priority, it deepens your connection and helps you navigate life’s challenges together. You have a shared foundation and purpose that transcends the ups and downs of marriage. Your relationship is rooted in something eternal. Pursuing spiritual intimacy also means supporting each other’s individual relationship with God. You create space for each other to spend time with God, process spiritual matters, and grow at their own pace. You are partners in the journey, not competitors.
Keeping Christ at the Center
Keeping Christ at the center of your marriage requires intentionality and discipline. It’s easy for other priorities and distractions to creep in and push God to the periphery. Here are some practical ways to keep Christ central:
When you make these spiritual disciplines a habit, they help you stay connected to God and each other. They create a rhythm of grace and growth in your marriage.
A Christ-centered marriage is not easy, but it is the most rewarding and fulfilling way to do marriage. When you make God the foundation, it frees you to love each other deeply, forgive freely, and grow together in holiness. Your marriage becomes a powerful witness to the world of God’s redeeming love. If you want to have a Christ-centered marriage, it starts with each spouse making God the top priority in their individual lives. As you grow closer to God, you will naturally grow closer to each other. Commit to pursuing God together, modeling Christ’s love, relying on God’s grace, and keeping Christ at the center. With God’s help, you can build a marriage that lasts and brings glory to Him.
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