Exceptional Marriages Require Teamwork

A Christian marriage is a covenant relationship between a man and woman before God. It is not just a contract, but a lifelong commitment to love, honor, and cherish one another. For a Christian marriage to thrive, it requires teamwork between the husband and wife. Teamwork is essential for navigating the joys and challenges of married life together.

The Biblical Basis for Teamwork in Marriage

The Bible provides a clear foundation for teamwork in marriage. In Genesis 2:24, God declares “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” This teaches that marriage creates a new family unit where the husband and wife are united. They are now a team, working together in all aspects of life. The apostle Paul reinforces this idea in Ephesians 5:31 when he quotes Genesis 2:24 and then adds “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.” Paul is drawing a parallel between the marriage relationship and the relationship between Christ and the church. Just as Christ and the church are a team working together, so too are the husband and wife.

Teamwork Requires Submission and Sacrifice

For a husband and wife to function as an effective team, they must be willing to submit to one another and make sacrifices for each other. Ephesians 5:21 instructs “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” This means both the husband and wife must be willing to put the other person’s needs ahead of their own at times. Ephesians 5:22-33 goes on to explain what this looks like practically. Wives are called to submit to their husbands “as to the Lord” (v.22). This doesn’t mean blind obedience, but a willing deference to the husband’s leadership. Husbands are called to love their wives “as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (v.25). This means the husband must be willing to sacrifice his own desires and even lay down his life for his wife if necessary. When a husband and wife embrace this mutual submission and sacrifice, it creates an unbreakable team. They are no longer focused on their own interests, but on serving one another and glorifying God together. This is the essence of teamwork in a Christian marriage.

Teamwork Requires Communication and Conflict Resolution

For a husband and wife to function as an effective team, they must communicate openly and honestly with one another. Ephesians 4:15 instructs us to “speak the truth in love.” This means having the courage to share our thoughts and feelings, even when it’s difficult, but always with the goal of building up our spouse. Conflict is inevitable in any marriage, but a strong team knows how to navigate it in a healthy way. Proverbs 15:1 says, “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” When conflicts arise, a husband and wife must be willing to speak gently, listen attentively, and seek to understand one another’s perspective. They must also be quick to forgive, just as Christ forgave us (Ephesians 4:32). When a husband and wife communicate openly and resolve conflicts in a Christ-like manner, it builds trust and intimacy in their relationship. They become a strong, united team that can weather any storm.

Teamwork Requires Shared Goals and Priorities

For a husband and wife to function as an effective team, they must be aligned on their goals and priorities. Amos 3:3 asks, “Do two walk together, unless they have agreed to meet?” The obvious answer is no. For a couple to walk together in marriage, they must be in agreement on the direction they are heading. This starts with having Christ at the center of their marriage. Colossians 3:17 instructs us “And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” A Christian marriage must be built on a shared commitment to love and serve God together. From there, a husband and wife must prayerfully determine their shared goals and priorities. These may include raising godly children, serving in ministry together, managing finances wisely, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, etc. Whatever their specific goals may be, the key is that they are united in pursuing them as a team. When a husband and wife have shared goals and priorities, it creates a powerful synergy in their relationship. They can encourage and support one another, and to accomplish far more together than they ever could apart.

Teamwork Requires Perseverance and Grace

Marriage is not always easy. There will be times when a husband and wife face significant challenges and struggles. But a strong team knows how to persevere through the tough times. Galatians 6:9 encourages us “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.” This applies to marriage as well. A husband and wife must be willing to keep working at their relationship, even when it’s hard. They must be committed to doing good for one another, even when they don’t feel like it. At the same time, a husband and wife must extend grace to one another. Romans 3:23 reminds us “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Both the husband and wife will make mistakes and fall short at times. But a strong team knows how to forgive and extend grace, just as Christ has forgiven and extended grace to us. When a husband and wife persevere through challenges with grace and forgiveness, it deepens their bond and makes their team even stronger. They learn to rely on God’s strength and to trust in His plan for their marriage.

A Christian marriage is a beautiful picture of the relationship between Christ and the church. It is a covenant relationship built on love, trust, and mutual submission. For a Christian marriage to thrive, it requires teamwork between the husband and wife. They must be willing to communicate openly, resolve conflicts in a Christ-like manner, pursue shared goals and priorities, and persevere through challenges with grace and forgiveness. When a husband and wife function as a strong team, it not only blesses their own marriage, but it also serves as a powerful witness to the world around them. It demonstrates the transformative power of the gospel and the beauty of God’s design for marriage. May all Christian marriages strive to be teams that glorify God and point others to Christ.