Modern feminism has shifted the way countless young women approach womanhood, family, and their most significant callings. For decades now, the culture has promoted a vision of ultimate fulfillment found in career achievement, the pursuit of independence, and self-defined success. These forces all converge in the “girlboss” narrative—a message that implicitly, and often explicitly, tells young women that anything less than relentless ambition and self-actualization is “settling.” Among its most serious casualties is the gift and calling of motherhood—a role now too often portrayed as distraction, detour, or even a liability.
From Social Messages to Real Lives
If a young woman wants to feel validated in modern culture, she’s told to prioritize education, chase promotions, rack up travel miles, and cultivate the kind of self-sufficiency that needs no one. Advertisers, politicians, and popular influencers are in lockstep: Personal fulfillment is found in charting one’s own path, achieving as much as men (and more), and finding liberation not through faith or family, but through career superiority and personal accomplishment.
The fruit of this movement is easy to find. Women are encouraged to delay marriage and postpone having children until everything else is in place—degrees obtained, career ladders climbed, apartments furnished, and adventures lived. Motherhood is treated either as a seasonal inconvenience (“wait until you’re ready”) or an obstacle to be navigated. The “girlboss” philosophy wraps all this into a shiny bow, celebrating young women who hustle ceaselessly and see family, especially motherhood, as a lesser choice.
What’s often unspoken—not advertised on Instagram or TED talks—is that the relentless chase for achievement can come with a price. Women who invest everything in career success often arrive in adulthood ill-prepared for the deep, slow work of nurturing children and building a lasting family. As the demands on women have grown, the supports that once protected and encouraged mothers have faded, leaving many to juggle work and family alone—overwhelmed and exhausted.
Motherhood as “Not Enough”?
The consequences run deep. Feminism’s skepticism about feminine, domestic, and nurturing roles has not just devalued motherhood—it has isolated mothers, making them feel their choice is somehow “not enough.” In past generations, being a dedicated mother was honored in church, neighborhood, and even the wider world. Today, many mothers sense suspicion or even pity, as if raising children is an outmoded ambition or evidence of unfulfilled potential.
Many women feel torn between two messages; one from faith communities and tradition that celebrates and elevates motherhood, and one from the wider culture that suspects or subtly ridicules it. They are told that their greatest contribution can only be made “out there,” leaving them to feel unseen and undervalued if they choose home and family.
This shift is everywhere to see—delayed families, declining birth rates, and a notable increase in anxiety, depression, and loneliness among young women. The push to chase experiences and “build your resume” means motherhood becomes an afterthought or the last item on an endless to-do list. When women do become mothers, many report feeling unprepared, unsupported, and profoundly alone.
The Perpetual Juggle
The myth of “having it all” is a cruel master. Today’s mothers, influenced by feminism and the “girlboss” ideal, face relentless expectations: to pursue careers at full throttle, maintain vibrant social lives, cultivate personal health, and nurture families all at once. What’s often missing is the honesty that work-life balance is rarely achievable in the way it’s pitched. Fulfillment is not found in extreme independence or endless ambition.
In the church, the same patterns often surface. Praise for professional achievement can outshine the quiet heroism of mothers raising children, teaching faith, and shaping souls. Young Christian women feel the tension as they absorb cultural messages and sense a growing divide between the dignity of motherhood and modern definitions of success.
Overwhelmed and Overlooked
The result of these pressures is more than just busy schedules. Many mothers find themselves deeply overwhelmed, trying to do it all without the family, church, or neighborhood support their own mothers and grandmothers enjoyed. Mental health struggles—anxiety, burnout, and depression—have risen sharply, especially among young mothers who feel the double burden of proving themselves at work and at home.
Despite messages of empowerment, today’s women are often lonelier and less fulfilled. The definition of “having it all” has become impossible, and the ongoing “motherhood penalty”—lower wages, stalled promotions, and career sacrifices—serves as a quiet but persistent discouragement. The gifts of nurturing and raising children are sacrificed for workplace metrics that don’t offer lasting joy or legacy.
What Was Lost in the Shift
What’s missing in the “girlboss” ethos and extreme feminism is the truth that fulfillment runs deeper than accolades, promotions, travel, or independence. The message that traditional femininity and nurturing are roadblocks to happiness is a lie that has robbed many women of joy and purpose. The calling of motherhood is inherently creative, relational, and eternal—it shapes not only souls but entire cultures. It is not settling for less; it is embracing the vocation God Himself treasures.
Among faith communities, the tension is especially pronounced. Christian women who choose motherhood as a primary calling often feel isolated, unappreciated, or forced to defend their choices. Former generations found honor in the selfless work of mothers who built faith and character into their children. Today, that work is minimized or replaced with suspicion—leading many Christian women to struggle privately with feelings of inadequacy or misplaced ambition.
Scripture’s View of Motherhood and Womanhood
God’s design for women is glorious. Children are described as a “heritage from the Lord.” The Proverbs 31 woman is praised, not for achieving status, but for her wisdom, kindness, and diligent care for her family. Mary’s humility and obedience, Hannah’s sacrificial prayers, and Naomi’s mentorship all reveal God’s affirmation of women who nurture, guide, and bless others.
Christian teaching reminds us that value and purpose are not found primarily in external achievement, but in relationships, service, and sacrificial love. From a biblical perspective, the role of mother and nurturer is not secondary. It is at the very heart of God’s redemptive plan.
Rediscovering Fulfillment in the Everyday
The reality is, true fulfillment is found as much in giving as in achieving. The “girlboss” ideal promises meaning through striving for one’s private goals—but joy, purpose, and even lasting self-worth are often found in pouring ourselves out for others. When women return to nurturing, hospitality, and the slow work of raising the next generation, they are not stepping backward—they are living fully into their God-given inheritance.
In daily acts—changing diapers, reading aloud, praying over a feverish child—women make investments that transform families and impact eternity. Legacy, not accolades, is the mark of true greatness. The home remains God’s primary school for faith, hope, and love.
A Call to Reclaim Dignity
What culture needs now is not more “girlboss” icons, but more mentors, nurturers, mothers, and spiritual anchors. Churches and communities must restore the dignity of motherhood, celebrate its value, and offer support for overwhelmed moms rather than holding them up as outmoded or regretful.
It’s time to honor quietly heroic mothers and help young women rediscover the blessings, the spiritual growth, and the generational impact that come through faithful, intentional family life. We must say clearly that the best kind of fulfillment is not found in unlimited independence or fleeting acclaim, but in loving God and loving others, with home and family at the very center.
Moving Forward
Beyond “girlboss,” the answer is not swinging the pendulum to extremes but building lives marked by service, faith, and relational investment. A whole generation needs permission—and encouragement—to choose motherhood, mentorship, and nurturing as virtues worth celebrating, not as shortcomings to be explained away.
May churches, Christian leaders, and older women teach the young that motherhood is a divine calling and gifts that enrich women’s lives. As society reconsiders the cost and promise of “having it all,” let the people of God lead with a better story—one where women are honored not just for what they achieve, but for whom they love and serve.
Modern feminism may have changed the rules, but it cannot erase the essential truth: women find their deepest calling by living for something far greater than themselves. May every young woman know her worth and dignity, and may the next generation reclaim the power and joy of lives devoted to God, family, and future.