Naked and Unashamed: Keeping a Pure Marriage

When you hear the phrase “naked and unashamed,” what comes to mind? For many, it’s an image straight from the opening chapters of Genesis, where Adam and Eve stood before each other and before God, completely exposed—physically, emotionally, and spiritually—without any hint of shame. That’s a powerful picture of what God intended marriage to be: a relationship marked by openness, honesty, and purity.

But let’s be real—marriage in today’s world is anything but simple. We’re bombarded by messages that twist God’s design for intimacy, and even the best couples can find themselves struggling with shame, secrecy, or impurity. So, how can Christian couples reclaim God’s vision and keep their marriages pure, honest, and full of joy? Let’s dig in together.

God’s Original Design: Naked and Unashamed

In Genesis 2:25, we read, “And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” This isn’t just about physical nakedness. It’s about being fully known and fully loved. Adam and Eve had nothing to hide from each other or from God. There were no secrets, no masks, no fear of rejection. Their relationship was pure, open, and safe.

God designed marriage to be the most intimate human relationship possible. He wants husbands and wives to experience a deep connection—body, mind, and spirit. That kind of intimacy requires trust, honesty, and a commitment to purity. When we talk about being “naked and unashamed,” we’re talking about a marriage where both partners can be themselves, knowing they are loved and accepted.

The Entrance of Shame

Unfortunately, the story doesn’t end in Genesis 2. In Genesis 3, sin enters the world, and everything changes. Adam and Eve eat the forbidden fruit, and suddenly, they realize they are naked. What’s their first instinct? They cover themselves with fig leaves and hide from God. Shame enters the picture, and intimacy is broken.

This is the reality for all of us. Sin brings shame, secrecy, and distance into our relationships. Instead of openness, we hide. Instead of honesty, we cover up. Instead of purity, we settle for less. But the good news is that Jesus came to restore what was lost. Through His forgiveness and grace, we can experience healing and reclaim the purity and openness God intended for marriage.

What Does It Mean to Have a Pure Marriage?

Let’s get practical. What does a pure marriage look like? It’s more than just avoiding sexual sin (though that’s important). A pure marriage is one where both partners are committed to honoring God and each other in every area of life.

Here’s what that might look like:

• Emotional Honesty: You’re able to share your thoughts, feelings, and struggles without fear of rejection.

• Physical Faithfulness: You’re committed to sexual purity, both in your actions and your thoughts.

• Spiritual Unity: You pray together, study God’s Word, and encourage each other in your walk with Christ.

• Mutual Respect: You treat each other with kindness, patience, and understanding.

• Transparency: There are no secrets—about money, friendships, internet use, or anything else.

Purity isn’t just about what you avoid; it’s about what you pursue together. It’s about building a relationship where trust and love can flourish.

Guarding Your Marriage: Practical Steps

So, how do you keep your marriage pure in a world that seems set on tearing it apart? Here are some practical steps:

1. Prioritize Your Relationship with God

Your relationship with your spouse will only be as strong as your relationship with God. Make time for prayer, Bible reading, and worship—both individually and as a couple. When you’re both seeking God, you’ll be better equipped to love each other well.

2. Be Honest—Even When It’s Hard

Honesty is the foundation of intimacy. If you’re struggling with temptation, past hurts, or doubts, don’t keep it bottled up. Share your heart with your spouse. Yes, it can be scary—but true intimacy grows in the soil of honesty.

3. Set Boundaries

Protect your marriage by setting clear boundaries. This might mean avoiding certain movies or websites, being careful about opposite-sex friendships, or agreeing on how you’ll handle social media. Boundaries aren’t about mistrust—they’re about wisdom and respect.

4. Forgive Quickly

Every marriage involves hurt and disappointment. Don’t let bitterness take root. Be quick to ask for forgiveness, and quick to extend it. Remember, forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling.

5. Celebrate Intimacy

God created sex to be enjoyed within marriage. Don’t let shame or past mistakes rob you of this gift. Talk openly about your needs and desires. Make time for physical intimacy, and see it as a way to strengthen your bond.

6. Seek Help When Needed

If you’re struggling with issues like pornography, infidelity, or deep wounds from the past, don’t try to handle it alone. Seek help from a trusted Christian counselor or pastor. There’s no shame in asking for help—only hope for healing.

The Power of Prayer in Marriage

One of the most powerful tools for keeping your marriage pure is prayer. Praying together brings you closer to God and to each other. It’s hard to hold onto anger or secrets when you’re kneeling together before the Lord.

If you’ve never prayed together as a couple, start simple. Thank God for your spouse. Ask Him to bless your marriage. Pray for wisdom, patience, and protection. Over time, you’ll find that prayer becomes a lifeline—a way to invite God into every part of your relationship.

Dealing with Temptation

Let’s be honest—temptation is real. Whether it’s the lure of pornography, emotional affairs, or just the temptation to withdraw and hide, every couple faces challenges. The key is to face temptation together, not alone.

Talk openly about the things that tempt you. Don’t judge or shame each other. Instead, pray together and look for ways to support each other. Remember, God promises to provide a way out of every temptation. You don’t have to fight alone.

Restoring Purity After Failure

What if you’ve already blown it? What if your marriage has been touched by infidelity, pornography, or other forms of impurity? Is there hope?

Absolutely. God is in the business of restoration. No matter what has happened, forgiveness and healing are possible. It won’t be easy, and it may take time, but with God’s help, you can rebuild trust and restore intimacy.

Start by confessing your sin to God and to your spouse. Ask for forgiveness, and be willing to do the hard work of rebuilding trust. Seek counseling if needed. Most of all, remember that God’s grace is bigger than your failures.

Protecting Your Marriage from the Inside Out

Keeping a pure marriage isn’t just about avoiding the big sins. It’s about cultivating a relationship where love, trust, and honesty can grow. That means dealing with the little things—like selfishness, impatience, or neglect—before they become big problems.

Make it a habit to check in with each other regularly. Ask, “How are we doing?” Be willing to listen, and don’t get defensive. Marriage is a journey, not a destination. There will be ups and downs, but with God at the center, you can weather any storm.

The Role of Community

Don’t try to do marriage alone. Surround yourselves with other couples who share your values and can encourage you in your faith. Get involved in a church, join a small group, or find a mentor couple. We all need support and accountability.

Leaving a Legacy

When you choose to build a pure marriage, you’re not just blessing yourselves—you’re leaving a legacy for your children, your church, and your community. In a world that’s confused about love and marriage, your relationship can be a shining example of God’s design.

Imagine what could happen if more couples chose to be “naked and unashamed”—open, honest, and pure before God and each other. It would change families, churches, and even whole communities.

Final Thoughts

Marriage is a gift, but it’s also a calling. God invites us to experience a relationship that’s deeper and richer than anything the world can offer. It’s not always easy, but it’s always worth it.

If you want a marriage that’s “naked and unashamed,” start by inviting God into every part of your relationship. Be honest, set boundaries, forgive quickly, and pray together. When you do, you’ll discover the joy and freedom that comes from living God’s way.

Remember, no matter where you are on the journey, God’s grace is enough. He can heal what’s broken, restore what’s lost, and help you build a marriage that’s pure, strong, and full of love.

So take a step today. Talk with your spouse. Pray together. Commit to pursuing purity—not just in your actions, but in your hearts. God is cheering you on, and so are countless couples who have walked this road before you.

Here’s to marriages that are truly naked and unashamed—pure, honest, and filled with the love of Christ.