Premarital Inventory

This Premarital Inventory is designed for couples considering marriage. It aims to help you explore your relationship’s strengths, identify potential growth areas, and facilitate meaningful discussions about key aspects of marriage. Each partner should complete the inventory individually and then discuss their responses together. This process can deepen mutual understanding and provide valuable insights for building a strong foundation for your future together.

Instructions

Answer each question honestly based on your perceptions. Use the following scale to respond:

• 1: Strongly Disagree

• 2: Disagree

• 3: Neutral

• 4: Agree

• 5: Strongly Agree

After completing the inventory, review your answers with your partner or counselor to discuss areas of alignment and differences.

Premarital Inventory Questions:

Communication

1. We openly share our thoughts and feelings with each other.

2. I feel understood when I express my emotions to my partner.

3. We are comfortable discussing difficult topics.

4. My partner listens attentively without interrupting.

5. We resolve misunderstandings quickly and effectively.

Conflict Resolution

6. We handle disagreements calmly and respectfully.

7. We avoid blaming each other during conflicts.

8. Compromising feels natural in our relationship.

9. We seek solutions together rather than focusing on the problem.

10. I feel confident in our ability to manage future conflicts.

Money Management

11. We have discussed our financial goals and priorities as a couple.

12. We agree on how money should be spent and saved in marriage.

13. I trust my partner’s financial decisions and judgment regarding money matters.

14. We plan to create a joint budget after marriage that reflects both our priorities.

15. Financial stress does not significantly impact our relationship at this time.

16. We have talked about how we will manage bank accounts (joint or separate).

17. My partner and I agree on how we will handle debt (e.g., student loans, credit cards).

18. We have discussed how we will make major financial decisions together (e.g., buying a house, car).

19. I feel comfortable with my partner’s spending habits and financial priorities.

20. My partner and I have similar views on giving, tithing, or charitable contributions.

Family and Background

21. We have shared details about our family histories and traditions with each other.

22. Our families support our relationship and future plans for marriage.

23. We respect each other’s family dynamics even when they differ from ours.

24. My partner values my input regarding family matters or decisions.

25. We have discussed how we will balance time with both families after marriage.

Spiritual Beliefs

26. Our spiritual beliefs align well with each other.

27. Faith plays an important role in our relationship.

28. We pray or engage in spiritual practices together regularly.

29. I feel supported in my personal spiritual journey by my partner.

30. We plan to raise children with shared spiritual values.

Roles and Responsibilities

31. We have discussed expectations for household responsibilities after marriage.

32. I am comfortable with the division of roles we envision for marriage.

33. My partner values my contributions to the relationship equally.

34. We understand each other’s career aspirations and support them.

35. Decision-making feels balanced between us.

Intimacy

36. I feel emotionally connected to my partner most of the time.

37. Physical affection is an important part of our relationship.

38. We have discussed expectations regarding sexual intimacy in marriage.

39. My partner respects my boundaries regarding intimacy.

40. Our level of intimacy makes me feel secure in the relationship.

Personal Growth

41. My partner encourages me to pursue personal goals and interests.

42. I feel comfortable sharing my weaknesses with my partner.

43. We help each other grow emotionally, spiritually, and intellectually.

44. I trust that my partner will support me during challenging times.

45. Our relationship inspires me to become a better person.

Parenting

46. We have discussed whether we want children in the future.

47. Our views on parenting align well with each other’s values.

48. I trust my partner’s ability to be a good parent if we have children.

49. We have considered how we will discipline children together.

50. Raising children feels like a shared responsibility between us.

Future Goals

51 (Bonus). We have talked about our long-term goals as a couple (e.g., career, home, lifestyle).
52 (Bonus). I am confident we can achieve our shared goals together.

Scoring Key

• Add up your scores for each section (Communication, Conflict Resolution, etc.). Each section has 5 questions (or bonus questions where applicable).

• Higher scores indicate stronger alignment in that area, while lower scores suggest areas for growth.

Interpretation

• 200–250 points: Excellent alignment; strong foundation for marriage!

• 150–199 points: Good alignment; some areas may need attention but overall positive outlook.

• 100–149 points: Moderate alignment; several areas require discussion and improvement before marriage.

• Below 100 points: Significant differences; counseling or further discussion is recommended to address potential challenges.

By reviewing these results, couples can celebrate their strengths while working on areas that need growth, ensuring a healthier and more fulfilling marital journey ahead!