Unpacking Your Emotional Baggage

1. Admit you have baggage!

We all have emotional baggage that needs to be unpacked. No one gets through life without being wounded or wounding others. If you are going to unpack your emotional baggage, you first need to be honest with yourself. Start the healing process by answering some basic questions:

• Who is it that you resent or blame for your emotional pain?

For most of us, it is hard to admit that people, especially those who were supposed to love and protect us, mistreated and harmed us. Some may even blame God.

• What did they say or do to you?

Make a list of everything that was said or done to you, which you still hold against them. Don’t explain away their sinful behavior, but be honest with yourself.

• What have you said or done that you deeply regret and still feel a sense of guilt and shame?

Emotional pain also results from the foolish and ungodly things that we have said or done to others. Make a list of things that you regret saying or doing.

2. Stop making excuses for dealing with your baggage.

Confronting your emotional baggage takes courage. There may be many very powerful feelings associated with your baggage, which may seem overwhelming. To delay in addressing your unresolved issues is to postpone the healing process.

3. Stop the blame game.

Although it is much easier to go through life blaming others and ourselves than directly addressing the unresolved issue, we must eventually take responsibility for our life if we are going to be healthy and whole. The blame game doesn’t change anything. If you are stuck in this cycle—snap out of it! Your life will never get better and you will never move forward until you stop the blame game.

4. Grant forgiveness.

After admitting that you have emotional baggage, understanding where it comes from, and that you have been choosing to hold onto it, the next step is to let it go. It is time to stop blaming and holding resentment against yourself and those who have wounded you. Let go of the anger, pain, blame, resentment and all other emotions that are depleting your energy. This is accomplished by forgiving yourself and by forgiving others. You won’t ever forget what got you to this point, but forgiveness will allow you the freedom to leave it in the past where it belongs.

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